Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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