Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
