bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
