That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
