How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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