You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
