You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
