soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
