I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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