mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
