AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
