Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
