Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
