We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
