If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
