Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
