how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
