I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
