I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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