Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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