I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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