i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize