I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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