If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
