I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The beer is more important than you right now.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize