Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Randomize
