What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
