I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
