Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
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