Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
