I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
