therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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