he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
