My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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