Where is the hickey?
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Randomize
