when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Found your dick twin last night
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
