So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
