So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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