Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize