I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
