There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
