i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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