Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
