Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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