Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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