My pussy is not your playground.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
