yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize