Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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