it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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