did you get engaged???
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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